Self-Sacrifice Brings Great Joy

Lent, with its 40-day design, is an ideal time to grow in virtue, especially the virtue of self-sacrifice.  Through each year’s Lenten journey, we’re called to grow closer to Christ and to increase in virtue.

In the CTB Anthology Ashes: Visible & Invisible, my short story, No Greater Love, tells of 15-year-old Lexie Dugan, the oldest of five children and the family's only daughter. Her mother is pregnant but has complications. The mom is on bed rest, and her parents rely on Lexie to help with extra chores and babysitting. Although it’s Lent, Lexie feels like she’s giving up her entire extracurricular life and, in a moment of selfishness, blurts out to her mother that she’s “never having kids.”

This short story is based on my experience many years ago as a pregnant mother on bed rest whose oldest son was forced by circumstances to do extra chores.  It also happened to be Lent. My son was only 12 at the time and hadn’t yet fully embraced the virtue of self-sacrifice.  One day was particularly difficult. There was a flood in the basement, and dishes and laundry were piled high. Even if I hadn’t been on bed rest, it would’ve been a challenging day. I had to depend on my oldest to do some of those chores.  After a few weeks, like Lexie in the short story, my son said, “That’s it. I’m never having kids. It’s too much work.”

I remember thinking, Uh-oh, this wasn’t what I wanted to teach my kids. The beauty of being open to life and having children is that babies are always great gifts to their families, despite the sacrifices. I knew self-sacrifice brought great joy because I had already had four children and worked part-time from home. Parenting is tough, but the overwhelming joy has always made it worthwhile.

Weeks later, when my fifth baby was finally born, I had just finished nursing him and placed him in his bassinet in the living room.  My oldest son, the one who proclaimed, “I’m never having kids!” went over to the bassinet and gently picked up his tiny baby brother. The baby started cooing and making adorable sounds. My oldest son spoke in a high-pitched voice. “Well, aren’t you the cutest baby?” The baby smiled. My son turned to me and said, “I’ve changed my mind. I want to have kids.” This son grew up to marry a disabled woman and has been her primary caretaker for many years. His devotion and dedication are remarkable.

Adolescence is a time when teens struggle with self-centeredness, and this struggle is very evident in the story about Lexie. Like my son, she at first resents the extra responsibilities, but, like her real counterpart, she eventually realizes that self-sacrifice brings great joy. This theme is prevalent in my Great War Great Love series, and all books in the series are featured on CatholicTeenBooks.com.

This Lent, let’s try to practice self-sacrifice, even in small ways: allow others to go before you in line, wake up 30 minutes early once a week to help a family member, give away items to those in need, visit the local seniors’ home, and fast from treats.

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Join us on March 18^th as author Corinna Turner reflects on her story, A Very Jurassic Lent.

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About the author: ELLEN GABLE HRKACH is an author of twelve books, ghostwriter of five books, self-publishing book coach, speaker, publisher, NFP teacher, book reviewer, and instructor in the Theology of the Body for Teens. She is the former president of the Catholic Writers Guild, and her books have won multiple awards, including the Gold Medal in the IPPY Awards and First Place in the Catholic Media Association Awards. Married to her husband of 40 years, James, she is also the mother of five adult sons, three daughters-in-law, and Grammy to two precious grandchildren. When she’s not writing, Ellen can be found watching classic movies, researching her family tree, and reading Dr. Seuss books with her grandchildren. Originally from New Jersey, Ellen lives with her husband in rural Ontario, Canada. Her website is at www.EllenGable.com.